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Mother and Baby

The Toddler Flight Experiences All Mums Know About

Whether it’s two hours or 12, there are some rites of passage you only experience at umpteen thousand feet with your toddler. Happy flying!
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The rush out the door

You set the alarm an hour early and the bags were packed the night before. Yet, anything involving passports inevitably sees you all legging it out the door and bundling into the car at high(ish) speed. It wasn’t like this before children. Image: Corbis
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The trolley ride

In the absence of a sofa, your child sits (and is maybe even pushed if he’s lucky) on the trolley with the sort of glee usually reserved for when Gangnam Style comes on the radio. You’re a little bit jealous you can’t do it, too. Image: Corbis
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The check-in juggle

Umpteen passports, a grizzly toddler and that irrational panic that you don’t look like the type of organised/innocent/wonderful family they’ll want to let on the plane. Stand up straight, now. Image: Corbis
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The vending machine

Don’t make eye contact with it. Don’t let your toddler. Oh fine, then. Dairy Milk and a Ribena it is. It is a holiday, after all. Image: Corbis
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The boarding relief

Three cheers for letting people with kids get on first! Image: Corbis
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The seat hope

Holding your breath as you approach your seats in anticipation of your neighbour. Fingers crossed it’s someone minus a briefcase of important, high-security documents. Or at least a person with headphones. Or smiling. Image: Corbis
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The take-off stand up

The seatbelt sign is on, but your toddler is definitely not sitting still. Why miss all the fun going on outside? Especially if you’re delayed on the tarmac. iPad at the ready… Image: Corbis
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The round-the-track laps

Just like students doing a circuit of a bar to see who’s there, chances are your toddler will want to do a few laps of the plane. Particularly while the food/drink trolley is doing the rounds. Image: Corbis
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Wine wistfulness

Is that gin on the drinks trolley? Sigh… Image: Corbis
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The chair-in-front kick

For someone with seriously little legs, your toddler sure can use them. That poor person in front. Move over, Walcott. Image: Corbis
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The passenger curiousity

With so many new people around, your toddler’s social side appears with gusto. One M&B-er’s family sat behind a bald man on a flight and their two year old thought it was funny to slap his head continuously. The man and his wife certainly didn't. Image: Corbis
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Proud mum face

That warm and fuzzy feeling as other passengers ‘aw’ over your child. Yes, he is so cute and hilarious. Image: Corbis
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The airhostess attention

Toddlers definitely get the most attention from cabin crew. Image: Corbis
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The toilet investigation

When he touches everything in the plane toilet, including the actual loo. Enough to give you OCD-style palpitations. Image: Corbis
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Toy envy

No amount of books/Lego/teddies are as interesting as the Kindle/magazine/nail varnish your neighbour is enjoying. Image: Corbis
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PG movies

The in-flight film options include that Halle Berry one that isn’t even out in the UK yet. But, if you get a chance to put a movie on, then it’s the children’s section all the way. Image: Corbis
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The nap bliss

He’s having a snooze. Ah… Image: Corbis
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The seatbelt resistance

The light pings, the captain speaks and it’s seatbelts on for descent. Just before your little one loudly announces he needs a poo. Image: Corbis
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Leaving the plane

Woop woop! You made it. Image: Corbis
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Huge sigh of relief

Happy holiday! Image: Corbis
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