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Mother and Baby

What If Your Labour Didn't Go To Plan?

Not getting what you want when it comes to birth can be hard to deal with - but try not to dwell on the things that didn't happen

You've done the pregnancy part. You got through the birth bit. You've got a beautiful, healthy baby! But feeling unhappy about the way your birth went is bothering you and you're finding it hard to reconcile those feelings with the euphoria of being a new mum. So what to do?

DO Ask for a de-brief from your midwife

You should be able to find out what happened and why before you leave the hospital. And even if you can't change anything, it may help you understand why things went that way.

DON'T think you're being silly to feel upset you didn't get the birth you wanted

Having a baby is a huge deal and many women have great expectations for labour and birth. No one can judge you for feeling the way you do.

DO talk to someone about how you feel

Whether it's your partner, mum or friends, it will help to talk things though.

DON'T be hard on yourself

No one can control what happens during birth and you can only make the decisions you feel are best for you and your baby.

DO take care of your physical health

Make sure you eat and stay hydrated. You need to keep up your strength to heal, feel positive – and look after your little one.

DON'T think you've failed in any way

Having a baby is an amazing feat and you've done it!

DO know that your midwife will have done her best

She will have made your baby's and your health and safety a priority.

DON'T avoid getting help

See your GP or health visitor if your feelings are getting you down.

 
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