Month eight of your pregnancy...in which you get a bit of a crush on your midwife and your boobs feel wet.
There you are sitting comfortably chatting to a friend about how you’ve still got weeks left before bubs arrives, when, woah! You’re suddenly having a contraction.
You spasm in your chair, your face goes a bit pale and your friend is having images of being your last-minute birth partner. But then, phew, you’re fine. It’s gone. It’s like it never happened.
What are Braxton Hicks?
Well, this is probably your body doing teeny practice runs for the big day by having Braxton Hicks. They’re tightenings of the uterus that last up to about 30 seconds and can scare the living you-know-what out of you when you first feel one. Don’t worry, they’re just your body’s way of letting you know what’s to come! How thoughtful.
Despite these little surprises, you’re an old hand at this pregnancy thing now. In fact, you feel like you’ve been pregnant forever and though it’s not quite that long, you are absolutely forgiven if you feel a little bit fed up.
Rollercoaster of emotions
There’s every chance you don’t really know how to feel at the moment.
One minute you’re shattered, the next you’re determined to build all that flat pack stuff in the nursery, the next you’re on the floor having a good old sob.
As you well and truly wallow in the hammock of the third trimester you find yourself uttering a new phrase - ‘I’m SO ready now’. You want to meet your baby and the waiting is getting tough.
It’s hard to give two hoots about anything other than you and your bump and that’s totally understandable. You might be at the point where you’re harrumphing about still having to go to work and you’re constantly daydreaming about lying on the sofa and doing that malteser trick with your bump - and that’s all OK. You’re like a marathon runner who has hit a wall - so console yourself with the fact that you don’t have to run anywhere, at least.
But, there’s plenty to keep you going. You’ll be thrilled to be seeing a bit more of your midwife. Secretly, you look forward to her visits like she’s an old friend who’s going to tell you everything’s alright. You know when you really like a celebrity and think ‘oh I wish she was my friend’? Midwives are a bit like that aren’t they?
You start to wish the the two of you were best pals and you fantasise about hanging out after baby’s birth and telling everyone the story of how you became mates. Chances are you’ll never see each other again, but for now she’s got your back.
Checking your birth plan
By now you will know where you would like to give birth and you’re wondering a lot about whether it will happen the way you’ve planned. If you’re going into hospital you’ve no doubt had a visit and seen your room of choice - you really want the one with the big bath and space to bounce around on a birth ball!
If you’re staying at home you might have had a birth pool practice run - whether you laughed hysterically as you tried to fathom how it goes up or your partner ended up going off in a huff, you’re just thankful you got through it without going into early labour!
You’ll be really sensitive to every ache and pain now and you’ll also be pretty used to your baby’s movements. Last month you got fed up of being woken up by a kick in the ribs but this month she might worry you by going a bit quiet and slowing down her movements. She just can’t please you!
Just remember the end is in sight and she has less room in there now to flip about - plus, she’s your child, she’s supposed to give you endless worry.
Anyway, what’s that on your top? OH….we think your boobs might be leaking...anyone got a breast pad?
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