Mother and Baby

18 Things You Can Only Get Away With If You’re Under Two

Do you sometimes envy your toddler and their seemingly carefree life? Yep, there are definitely some things you could not get away with now.
Expand Image

Run around naked. Anywhere.

Sometimes on a hot day you just want to rip your clothes off and become a nudist, but this is definitely not acceptable in the office.
Expand Image


You definitely saw that dress in the French Connection sale first. Now if only you could go all 'toddler' on her and snatch it back, screaming 'MINE!'
Expand Image

Refuse to share

Tapas are our worst nightmare. Chips are not meant to be shared. No you can’t have a ‘bite’. (Well, this is what you think anyway, whilst sweetly saying ‘yes of course you can!')
Expand Image

Ignoring people

Oh how we wish we could walk away in the middle of a conversation when we’re bored – just like a toddler. But no, these days that would be branded rude and anti-social. Sigh.
Expand Image

Daytime naps. Whenever, wherever

Sometimes we’d just love to be able to take a snooze on our desk or have a little lie down on that park bench…
Expand Image

Always choosing the (same) movie

There's only so many times you can get away with putting on The Notebook and having a good sob, without having to compromise with the other half who wants to watch Transformers.
Expand Image

Being pushed around everywhere

Sometimes we really wish we could be a baby, being carted around in what is essentially a lovely cosy bed with wheels. Whoever thought heels were a good idea?!
Expand Image


Now you're a grown up, there's not explanation that will let you get away with grabbing whatever takes your fancy and nonchalantly walking out of the store
Expand Image

Saying exactly what you think

The amount of times you wish you could say exactly what you think about your friend's new boyfriend/that man in the street/the food someone's just lovingly prepared for you. But we’re far too polite these days.
Expand Image

Creating a mess

Oh how we long for the days when someone would clean up after us. And even better when you can make a chaotic mess at a friend’s house, then leave without the slightest guilt.
Expand Image

Dress like no one is looking

Tiara with wellington boots and a cape? Cute when you're a toddler, weird when you're an adult. And that goes for your Cinderella costume too.
Expand Image

Rude alternatives to normal words

Now you know how to speak, there's no getting away with that alternative word that almost sounds like cake…
Expand Image

Finding joy in bodily functions

And letting EVERYBODY know about it.
Expand Image

Being fussy - about everything

You'd be labelled pedantic these days, or intolerably fussy. But sometimes we do just want things done, just the way we want them to be done. Even if that's completely different to what we said yesterday.
Expand Image


It may be the most sincere form of flattery, but just try refusing to answer unless someone calls you by your current hero's name.
Baby-led weaning - your essential guide Expand Image Baby-led weaning - your essential guide

Laughing when someone falls over

We may laugh in our heads now, but we daren't giggle out loud.
Expand Image

Pee wherever you like

Sometimes we wish we could just run to the nearest patch of grass to relieve ourselves, but instead, we hold it in for the entirety of our hour's commute home.
Expand Image

Play all day long

A whole day to do whatever we want, guilt-free? Sounds heavenly.
Related content: