Has Being A Mum Turned You Into Your Own Mother?



Yes, I did see that…
You really have developed eyes in the back of your head. It's a new talent that scares your husband as much as the kids, but that has proved essential while driving. Image from Corbis.


The drink du jour
The first thing you do when you arrive anywhere - a shopping centre, a stately home, soft play centre - is seek out a nice cup of tea. Image from Corbis.


The must watch
The boring bits of Mary Poppins, when the banker dad becomes all mushy and wants to talk to his children, are suddenly your favorite bits. Fly a kite, you say? Feed the birds? This is deep, man. Image from Corbis.


You said what?
You use useless expressions like 'well, when it's gone, it's gone' repeatedly, despite being met with blank expressions every time, and not really understanding them yourself. Image from Corbis.


‘It does matter’
You bicker with your partner over silly things like remembering to take a loaf out of the freezer or who forgot the Sainsbury's loyalty card. Image from Corbis.


Shopping habits
Going for a look ‘around the shops’ actually means just ‘around John Lewis’. And just the haberdashery and children's departments at that. Image from Corbis.


Lust list
You've developed a crush on the Captain from The Sound of Music. How could you have not noticed before? He's so stoic, brave and dependable. The eldest blonde son you liked in your youth looks positively wimpy now.


Hashtag that…
Rather than being effortlessly cool, you now make an effort to know what the kids think is cool... But always get it wrong. Get off The Facebook, old girl, and close that Instagram account. Or at least only use them while sober. Image from Corbis.


Do you have any ID?
You've noticed that policemen, firemen and department store Santas now look younger than you. And don't get started on people who work in your local banking branch. You could have given birth to them. Image from Corbis.


The best workout
Hoovering is as rewarding as a trip to the gym - you use a quick zip round with a vacuum as a way to burn calories, feel good about yourself and to increase your sex appeal to your husband. Image from Corbis.


Alone at last
8pm is your favorite time of day. Not because you're going out somewhere fun and fabulous like you used to, but because everyone else is in bed. You never love your children more than when they are asleep. You might even use your down time without them to gaze lovingly at photos and videos taken that day. Now you understand why your mum was in her nightie at sunset. Image from Corbis.


The place to be
You enjoy a trip round a garden centre as much as a trip to a sceney new bar. There's so much potential. You can imagine a life filled with lavender sachets and hardy, hardy perennials. And there's so many pretty shades of watering can to choose from. Image from Corbis.


Lingerie heaven
You find the idea of getting knickers from anywhere other than M&S laughable. They won't last, they're too small and they won't survive a third wash. You know where you are with Marks and Sparks. Image from Corbis.

