Before children, your mornings consisted of coffee, newspapers, a shower and perhaps even a trip to the gym. Now, post-kids and in the land of play school politics, you're lucky to have fresh breath
1 Toddler Brain
In a pre-caffeine fog, you can't remember the name of the nice lady at the gates despite countless introductions, so you are forced to call her 'sweetheart' every morning.
2 Styling it out
The unbrushed hair you hoped made you look sexily disheveled actually makes you look like one of Macbeth's witches.
3 The Outfit Fail
You think you've managed to pass off your breakfast-stained leggings as a piece of art, but no one is fooled by the dried Cheerios stuck to your bottom.
4 The secret thoughts
Forgetting your little one's lunch box you half persuade yourself, 'They can fend for themselves, no? Do I really need to go back and get it? I'll miss Jeremy Kyle.'
5 Breaking the rules
Not stopping for the lollipop lady when you're driving - but you're late and it's not raining... She's such a jolly lady, will she care?
6 New mum logic
Assuming the zig zag lines outside a school means that you can park there. Are they not road markings for harassed mums? Really, I can get clamped?
7 The main attraction
Running so late you don't have time to innocently flirt with the cute stay-at-home dad. Getting your tiny terrors ready against the clock is stressful, you should at least make time for some eye candy as you wave them off for a few hours