The Emotions Of Trying To Conceive (TTC): The Man’s Perspective

by Alex Davies |

Riding the emotional rollercoaster of trying to conceive? Give this to your partner so he can work out how to get on board (or at least hang on for dear life)

The highs and lows of trying to conceive can leave you a bit of an emotional wreck to say the least – completely understandable when you and your partner are going through something so significant and personal. And mood swings be a side effect of fertility treatments such as Clomid.

So, if your partner’s on the receiving end of your ups and downs (and even having a few himself) we’ve put together this handy guide for you to leave in his bedside drawer.

It’ll be something for him to refer to when you’re still sobbing 20 minutes after One Born Every Minute’s been on.

Ride the emotional rollercoaster

Put simply, be there in whatever way she needs you. ‘This could mean giving her space one minute and holding her the next,’ says Dr Clare Murray, Couple and Psychosexual Therapist with The Tavistock Centre for Couple Relationships.

Accept that seeing her upset will be difficult for you, so surround yourself with people you can confide in and rely on for support, too.

Vent online

Research shows men going through the process of trying for a baby benefit from using online forums where they can chat to people experiencing similar things.

‘It’s the anonymity that’s so good with such an intimate topic,’ says Clare. ‘A man should use it as a place to get advice from other men in that situation – and vent if needs be.’

Take your own time out

Whether it’s on the treadmill or in front of Breaking Bad, find your own time out activity if you’re feeling swamped or overwhelmed.

Trying to conceive is a stressful time for men, too.

Don’t expect to always get it right

Realise that you won’t say exactly what she wants to hear or do precisely what she wants you to do every time.

‘Doing some research so you understand what to expect can be so helpful,’ says Clare. ‘But, there are lots of emotions involved during this time, so try not to put pressure on yourself to be perfect.’

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