Three in the bed(room): how to handle having your baby in your room

by Mother & Baby |

Having your baby snoozing nearby can be wonderful for bonding, but may mean your relationship habits need some tweaking

Whether it’s watching Newsnight in bed together or having breakfast under the duvet on a Sunday morning, your bedroom has probably been your couple haven for as long as you’ve been together.

Once you have your newborn sleeping in there, it’s completely understandable that the feel of the space may change slightly. But your bedroom can still be a special haven…

Put it into perspective

If you’re worried about your baby waking up while you’re having sex, remember your baby will sleep through and, even if she does wake up, she’ll have no idea what’s going on.

‘Your sex life is a big part of your relationship, so don’t feel bad for wanting to hold onto that when your baby’s here,’ says Christine Northam, counsellor for relationship charity Relate.

If you feel like you’re forever tripping over nappies, lotion and toys, get organised

Create new bedroom time

If you’re finding it tricky to recreate the quality couple time that you used to enjoy in there, perhaps take this as a chance to try something new.

‘Think about other ways you can enjoy time in there together,’ says Christine. ‘These can involve your baby so it becomes a new family space, as well as be just for the two of you.’

After all, who doesn’t love a mid-afternoon snuggle and a movie in bed?

Keep baby gear in another room

If you feel like you’re forever tripping over nappies, lotion and toys, get organised.

Just because your baby’s in your room, it doesn’t mean all her things have to be, so move non-essentials into her nursery now and hold onto key items in a corner near her Moses basket.

And get creative. Those linen shoe/clothing racks you hang on the wall or back of the door are ideal for storing nappies.

Focus on the long-term

For most parents, having their baby sleep in the bedroom is temporary – the Department of Health recommends it for the first six months – before you move her into her nursery.

Try and enjoy the bonding bonus of having her so nearby but, if you’re struggling, remind yourself it’s only a short-term situation.


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