Mother and Baby

15 things only pregnant women past their due date know

You were all ready for your due date and the arrival of your little bundle of joy, but that day passed over a week ago. You can barely stand up, your bump is huge and you’re actually looking forward to the labour.

Yep, being past your due date is not what you had bargained for.
Here are 15 things only pregnant women past their due date know...

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1) It’s totally acceptable to have a curry every night of the week

You no longer care about the fact that the majority of your screentime is spent scrolling through the Deliveroo app. You need to get this baby out now!
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2) Caring what you look like is a thing of the past

You put effort into your maternity wardrobe at first, but now finding anything that looks good over your giant baby bump is too big a task to merit the effort of getting out of your pajamas.
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3) Every scene from the latest series of Game of Thrones

Getting off the sofa is so much effort and you have been meaning to catch up on all your favourite series…
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4) Sex is comical

You read that sex can bring on labour but navigating around your baby bump is a logistical mission – with added comedy value.
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5) Flip flops are your best friend

You can’t even remember the last time you wore proper shoes, your feet are that swollen.
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6) You’re a pro at the hospital drill

Your hospital bag is by the door, you know the exact route and time it takes to get to the hospital and you’ve got your parents on speed dial. All you need is your contractions to kick in.
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7) You can't stand answers to that question

If one more person phones to ask you ‘have you had the baby yet?’ you might start pulling your hair out.
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8) The fake smile

Friends (and strangers) tell you that you look like you’re ready to pop. You smile and laugh, but inside you’re crying.
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9) You know every labour-inducing old wives tale

You’ve tried eating pineapple, taking evening primrose oil and even blowing up balloons - to no avail. Obviously.
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10) You know the local newsagent really well

When you want salt and vinegar crisps, you must have salt and vinegar crisps. Immediately.
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11) You never stray too far from the loo

The heavy weight of your baby resting on your bladder is making you want to pee constantly.
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12) Frequent visits to the park

You’ve never spent so much time in the local park, but you hope that keeping moving will bring on your labour (and you can’t face another episode of Loose Women).
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13) Entering a whole new level of crankiness

Whether it’s the hormones or impatience, your partner is stepping on eggshells around you in fear of your moods.
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14) You're haunted by every labour horror story on the Internet

You’ve got too much time on your hands and you’re starting to overthink the labour and every eventuality.
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15) Spilt things don’t get cleaned up

You would clean up your spilt cornflakes…but you really can’t face the effort of standing up again.

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